Let the hair loss begin! (oh, and before/after pics)

Well, the 4 month commencement of hair loss has started - I got quite a handful this morning - more than usual. *sigh* Fortunately, I have hair to spare, but it doesn't make it any easier. It's all good.

Scale has been a little stuck as of late - got down to 278 for a couple days, then with AF pending, I'm back up to 280. I figure it'll be gone next week. First week back on birth control in over 8 years.....so I'm sure that's not helping. My hormones are a hot mess, but I havne't yelled at Jeff yet - like last time I was on the pill....and it's the same one I was on ages ago. *lol*

So.....in an effort to not commit harey carey....and eat cake.....j/k.....I decided to take new after pics. In the process of checking them out, I was amazed at how different I look....how much smaller my butt is....and how much happier I look in the pics. I'm pretty happy about the pics....and they're going to help me stay focused. That's what I need to do.

So, hopefully these will go on without problems.... enjoy!

Thanks for reading! =)
<3 laur =")">

The Little Things People Will Do For You.....

Friends at work did a party for us occupational therapists for national OT month and they did small portion finger foods with me and my new tummy in mind. Now that's a wonderful group of people with whom I work. Incredible. Good news? I ate protein rich foods first - cheese, sausage casserole (with veggies and no breadcrumbs!), the inside out of a quiche. I also managed to get a bite or two of fruit in - strawberries and cantaloupe. Bad news? I allowed myself a bite of spanikopita, a cream puff, and a dark chocolate hershey kiss.

Is this really a bad thing? I try to think not.....since I did eat what I NEEDED first..... and it was only the second time I allowed myself this - the first being my sister's birthday. I know that carbs beget other carbs, which can be the downfall of any post WLS'er...... but I know it was an indulgence and it is not something I plan to do every day. I think that's the key. I may be rationalizing....but I hope it's post WLS wisdom.

When I used to go to a nutritionist pre my WLS journey, she used to say to me, "if you really want something, allow yourself to have a little - then you won't think it's 'not allowed', just 'not preferred'." I am typically an all or nothing girl - but my ideas have changed on this journey. Moderation used to be a word that meant little to me - but it's so much easier to understand that when your stomach is the size of a sharpie marker, like mine. You have to pick your foods carefully so you remain healthy..... and that makes all the difference to me.

I always pick my proteins first, followed by my veggies/fruits, and then - if I have room - I allow myself something sweet. Typically something sugar free (Sugar Free Rita's water ice is my only real indulgence)..... this was only the second time I allowed myself something sugary. It was TOO sweet....I think this'll last me a LONG time. And that is the difference this time around.

Man, I've gotten so stinkin' smart in the last year, huh? At least, I like to think so..... =)
Thanks for reading, as always!
Laur =)

12 weeks out - what a weekend!

Okay, I have to admit, I was not so good with my food this weekend. I'm sure I got the extra calories my nutritionist wanted, but odds are, she didn't want me to get them this way. But it was a wonderful weekend!

My sister turned 30. We threw her a surprise party - the jig was almost up when we got to the restaurant - she started recognizing cars in the parking lot.....I was so worried. It was wonderful! I was so happy we didn't manage to blow it before the actual party.

As for the food? Well, let's just say I had a few carbs. Okay, more than my usual few.... I had a couple bites of pizza (it was my favorite pizza in the world, so I indulged) but followed up with a grilled chicken breast for the protein. I had 2 bites of my sister's birthday cake - tasted heavenly, but almost too sugary! I'm so used to no sugar that the sugar in it was overwhelming. I also had a few sweet potato fries at Poor Richard's Pub Saturday night...but at least they were a vegetable *lol*. I made up for it in the days previous and after.... in fact, now that I read my list of "bad foods" it's not SOOO bad. A little variety is okay once in a while.

My muscles are so sore... we've been moving...and moved a LOT of stuff yesterday. I've been unpacking boxes and doing laundry. There's a certain freedom to starting over in a new space....a new opportunity to organize, to minimize, to center. I am not looking forward to going back to the house to finish this afternoon - it's so overwhelming. But my kitties are moving over today. And I have a couple friends coming to help move the remaining stuff this afternoon. For now? I'm a prisoner of my apt...waiting for the FiOS guy. Gonna be a long one.

Thanks for reading, all!
Laur =)

Three month follow up time!

I so love that I get to see my surgeon this time. I like Ed (the PA at the practice), but there's nothing quite like seeing the guy who did the deed. I love my surgeon. Dr. Irgau is amazing - sweet, knowledgable, encouraging. He is the type of person that when you're freaking out, he'll put your mind at ease....and you never doubt that he knows his stuff. My 3 month appt was great. From his initial numbers, I'm down 59# total - I started with him after I had lost a bit, so my total is 76#, but he was thrilled with his nonetheless. The biggest things that have changed in the last 3 months? 1. I am no longer borderline diabetic! My fasting blood sugar before surgery was 105, on my re-eval, it was 81!

2. My high blood pressure is no more! From 160's/80's to 110/70. People would pay good money for pressure like that!

3. I have more energy than before.... it's incredible. I no longer feel like crawling into bed and dying after a day's work. I have energy to grocery shop, go out, do my Wii Fit, anything!

4. My outlook on the future.... I now find myself saying, "when I lose the weight, I will..." rather than "IF I lose the weight I might be able to..."....it's quite a change in attitude....

So, I don't have to go back for 3 more months..... And who knows what my numbers will be then. I can hardly wait.

Thanks for reading! May be out of commission for a while.... moving into the apartment this weekend....plus heading to Scranton to celebrate my seester's birthday! Have a great weekend...and I'll catch you all later.

Laur =)

Goals - where I am and where I'm going

On ObesityHelp (my favorite WLS website!) I have two tickers tracking my progress.... 1 with lbs lost, and the other with lbs left to go until my initial goal of 190.

As of yesterday, my lbs lost ticker read 74.5, and my lbs to go read 97. I have less than 100 lbs to go to meet my first major goal. I can remember setting up the tickers and telling myself, "I haven't weight under 200 lbs since I was 11 years old! There's no way I'll get there." And yet, here I am, using my tool, rocking my sleeve, and almost halfway there. It seems crazy, but feels oh so good!

I have found myself setting mini goals to help me stay focused.... If I keep on the big goal and keep stalling, it is so easy to throw in the towel and go back to old habits. Even though the sleeve restricts how MUCH I eat, it surely doesn't restrict WHAT I eat....that's up to me. Good choices are paramount on this journey! So, a summary of my mini goals and where I'm at with them....

1. Get under 330 lbs so I can play Wii Fit - MET
2. Get under 300 lbs - MET
3. Travel on an airplane without needing the seatbelt extender - MET
4. Get into sizes 24 (MET), and 22 (MET)
5. Get under my weight at my wedding - I'm 1 lb away

Ones I haven't tried yet or are working toward:
1. travel coach on an airplane and not worry about crowding my neighbor
2. ride a roller coaster again
3. pick excursions on a vacation NOT based on the maximum weight allowed
4. go horseback riding (linked to #3)
5. lose 100 lbs
6. be able to shop with my sisters and not say, "I'll be over here in the Plus section"
7. walk/jog a 5k

LONG LONG term goals?:
1. Get under 200 lbs
2. Walk the Breast Cancer 3 day
3. take a spin class and not feel like I'm gonna die *lol* I'm not kidding - spin is HARD CORE!
4. Have a baby.

Keeping all those in mind keeps me sane and focused....and now, it's time for me to figure out my breakfast. Then it's off to look at houses again....hope we find something wonderful.
Thanks for reading!

Mock Cheese Danish Recipe - or Fake out!

By request - the mock danish recipe! I can't wait to try it for breakfast tomorrow! =)

Mock Danish
2 oz cream cheese (soften in microwave) 1 egg 1 tblspn splenda 1 tsp lemon concentrate 1/2 tsp vanilla
Mix softened cream cheese and egg. Add remaining ingredients. Microwave on high for 2 minutes.
Nutrition Facts of Original Recipe
Amount Per 1 serving
Calories 167.76
Calories from Fat 117
Total Fat 13g 20%
Saturated Fat 6.87g 34%
Polyunsaturated Fat 0.987g
Monounsaturated Fat 4.28g
Sodium 210mg 9%
Potassium 170mg 5%
Total Carbohydrate 4g 1%
Dietary Fiber 0g 0%
Protein 11.43g 23%

Good protein boost and sounds like it tastes OH SO GOOD!
I'm going to try it with egg beaters to save on the cholesterol and fat.....

I'll let you know! =)
Thanks for reading!

Almost 11 weeks out......

Hey, all!Well, it's almost been 11 weeks (I can't believe it!) and I'm loving life! I've had a couple of NSV's in the last couple of weeks, moreso then scale victories - but they all count and keep me motivated to keep on keepin' on.

As of today, I am 287lbs (just weighed), which is only 1# from my weight 10 years ago when I got married! That is a big accomplishment! The scale creeps rather than jumps at this point, but as long as it's going in the right direction, I'm a happy girl! I have changed to weighing only 1x/week - which helps me to maintain my sanity....weighing every day was making me crazy after the initial month when each and every day you have a loss of at least a pound. Once you get past that stage, DROP YOUR SCALE! Hide it or just use it once a week - trust me....every day will have you constantly adjusting and questioning yourself....your weight fluctuates each and every day.....even throughout the day! Save yourself....I do same amt of clothing each time, same time of day, and same day. Keeps things accurate......okay, back to my NSV's...

1. I had a patient at work tell me that she did not recognize me from the back and was about to ask where I was! Hilarious, since my booty used to be my biggest (no pun intended) defining feature on my body!

2. My 24s are getting huge on me and I'm wearing some size 22s.....I'm afraid to buy any though....I'll wait until they're falling off me and THEN move on...but cool!

3. I actually had to move my driver's seat CLOSER to the steering wheel. Now, for those of us who have been there - I ALWAYS moved the seat all the way back to accommodate my belly and booty....I found myself reaching uncomfortably for my steering wheel and decided to move it up....by the time I realized what I was doing, it was done and I was shocked! And I still had room to move, get in/out, etc. It's so awesome!

#4 is a little on the dirtay side....but I'm pleased to say there is some variety now in my *ahem* relations with my hubby..... I've gotten a bit adventurous with things...for the first time in FOREVER! (sorry to my sisters who read this - I know it's TMI, especially since you all know my hubbins!)

It's been a wonderful journey thus far and for those of you who are reluctant or in the early stages of this journey - believe me - it is COMPLETELY worth it. Even during the stalls and the frustrations - the energy, flexibility, ability to move, lack of worry about "will I fit in those seats?", "can I keep up with them?", "I don't want to sit on a bench while my sisters shop", etc.....make it totally worth each and every step.

Stay the course.....
<3 you all! Thanks for reading!
Laur =)

Having a tough day - not food wise, but otherwise...

I never like being the negative Nellie....but today is "one of those days". The best laid plans of mice and men....and all that bull$#!+. The second house we put a bid on got denied - so as of April 20th, we will be apartment bound. We knew this might happen, but the reality sucks.

Also today, the harsh reality that we can't even try to have a baby for a year hit me hard as I took my very first birth control pill since 2002. And as happy as I am for my long time friend to announce her foree into grandparenthood, I can't help but be bitter since we haven't even been able to have a baby yet in our life, let alone a grandbaby. I chose this new path so I could be healthy when Jeff and I become parents and so I have the longevity to love them and play with them and be there for them - but the reality stings from time to time..... I smile and press on and try very hard to be positive and focus on my current journey.... I am a healthier person and far happier than I was prior to surgery..... I keep focusing on that..... but today I am not-a-so-strong (imagine thick, fake Italian accent there).

Some great positives of today? I still have the best work team and family a woman could ask for. I have a great job, a supportive husband, a body with ever improving health and decreasing waistline, I have a ton of people whom I love and who love me in return. It is this list of plusses that keep me sane. Keep me focused. Keep me from devouring chocolate and sabotaging myself (and making myself sick, too). I keep positive because I choose to..... faith is far more powerful than chocolate - and more sustaining.

Thanks for putting up with my negatives...... and helping me stay positive.
<3 you all!
Laur =)

Completely silly, random, and off topic - but funny!

As you all know, my hubby and I are in the middle of moving - sold our house, buying another - may be apartment bound for a while. In the transition since we put the house on the market, our cats have been living in our utility room, as to not mess up the new carpet (I feel like a horrible mommy, but they don't seem to be minding it much - and we go down there as much as possible...). I have 6 furry babies - all of whom I love dearly! Anyhoo....

My in-laws send us an Easter package each year, and this year they included a cat toy for them! I couldn't wait to get down to give it to them and hang out. So, we bring the toy and some treats downstairs.... I give out treats and spend some quality snuggle time with the kitties - Spooky is in my lap chillin' and I hear hissing and slapping across the room - I look and my one cat, Champ, is guarding the toy and fighting everyone else off. I almost yelled at him, but then the funniest thing happened!

My former fraidy cat, Bo, gets smacked by Champ, and immediately makes his way to my seat - looks me straight in the eye and starts talking to me - loudly. I ask him sweetly, "what's wrong, honey?" - he proceeds to look at me and walk directly over to Champ and stand there. He was telling on his brother!! I thought it was hysterical!! =)

Thought I would share the wonderful world of being owned by your cats.

Thanks for reading! =)

<3
Laurie =)

House Happenings - and 1st Day with Wii Fit +

OMG, I have to say, the Wii Fit Plus KICKED MY BUTT! I LOVE it. I'm not a huge fan of exercise in general - but making it a video game helps me immensely! The fact that I can work each day to beat my previous scores helps me to maintain focus and stay on top of things. Also - I am finding that my center of gravity sucks and my ankles are super weak! I can't stand on one leg for more than about 30 seconds without having to anchor my other leg against my balancing leg - and it ain't pretty. Thank goodness I'm doing it in the comfort of my own home. *whew*
My core is sore and my hips are screaming. But it's all good - all for the greater good, right? Woop!

As for the house stuff - we're STILL waiting to hear about the new house - the selling realtor has been a bit less than helpful - but he seems to think we'll get a go on Monday and still be able to close by the 20th....that'll be 15 days from the OK - but we shall see. Either way - we may be apartment bound for a while until we can secure a new home. *shrug* The realtor recommended a long term hotel, etc....but my concern about that is what will we do with the cats! Oy, the cats. It's pretty hard to find a place to take cats....especially a hotel. So we're looking at apartments this weekend to see what's out there..... hopefully we'll find something. We may not have to, but it'll be good to have a contingency plan.

What a week! 10th anniversary-ness! I've been married to my best friend for 10 years....and still we act like newlyweds. It's amazing. I would be lost without him! =)

Thanks for reading, everyone! <3
Laurie =)